Stained Blue Jeans
by Ben Chester
Lyrics
Verse 1
I had the whole day planned
Kicked back in my favorite pants
Then that little twist hit hard
Right there in the parking lot
Coulda been a warning sign
Coulda been one bad burrito
Now I’m walking with a prayer
And a face that says, “oh no”
Pre-Chorus
Don’t ask me to stand still
Don’t ask me what I feel
I’m one step from disaster
One cough from losing it all
Chorus
Pooping in my pants
Pooping in my pants
I tried to play it cool
But it hit too fast
Pooping in my pants
Pooping in my pants
I’m laughing through the panic
Gotta make it home at last
Verse 2
Zoomed out of the grocery store
Held my breath past aisle four
Clenched so tight I saw stars
Banged my knee on my car door
Texted you a desperate lie
Said, “I’m stuck in traffic”
Truth was written on my face
And it smelled like pure chaos
Pre-Chorus
Don’t ask me to stand still
Don’t ask me what I feel
I’m one step from disaster
One cough from losing it all
Chorus
Pooping in my pants
Pooping in my pants
I tried to play it cool
But it hit too fast
Pooping in my pants
Pooping in my pants
I’m laughing through the panic
Gotta make it home at last
Bridge
If you see me sprinting by
Mind your business, let me fly
I’ll buy new jeans tomorrow
Tonight I just need mercy
Final Chorus
Pooping in my pants
Pooping in my pants
I tried to play it cool
But it hit too fast
Pooping in my pants
Pooping in my pants
I’m laughing through the panic
Gotta make it home at last
Pooping in my pants
Pooping in my pants
Yeah, it’s not my finest hour
But I’m still singing loud