PIPO & KCHIAA — THE ROAST

Lyrics

Intro
Yo…
Pipo… Kchiaa…
You boys wanted jokes about my songs?
Well, congratulations…
You just got your own damn diss track.
Let's go!

Verse 1 — Pipo
First up, Pipo, the music teacher,
Talks like he's Mozart, but ain't getting no feature.
Claims he's a songwriter, claims he's a guitar king,
But every time he plays, even the strings wanna leave. 😂

"Bro, your song ain't good, you should change that line."
Brother, have you heard your own songs lately?
That's a crime!

You teach music, but here's what I gotta say:
Your students learn more when you stay away.
You pick up that guitar, start feeling like a star,
Five minutes later we're praying for a power cut at the bar.

And Pipo got a stomach that's leading the parade,
Man walks into the room and the furniture gets afraid.
Big belly coming first, Pipo following behind,
That stomach needs its own postcode and a parking sign! 😂

Chorus
Pipo and Kchiaa, what a dangerous pair,
One can't write a song, the other can't see the air.
You roast my music, you laugh at my flow,
But boys, after this track, you're gonna need a lawyer though!

Pipo on guitar, Kchiaa with the glasses,
Two best friends making absolutely no passes.
I love you both, yeah, that's still the truth,
But you started this war…

Now I'm coming for you! 🔥

Verse 2 — Kchiaa
Now Kchiaa walks in, glasses darker than night,
Bro can't see the sun, can't see the traffic light.
Those lenses so thick, man, I'm telling you straight,
He needs Google Maps just to find his own plate. 😂

He's a carpenter, decorator, building things with pride,
But before he finishes the table, the party starts outside.
"Where's Kchiaa?" — probably dancing somewhere,
Lights flashing, music blasting, glasses everywhere.

He loves that trance, man, he's lost in the sound,
Four-on-the-floor while he's jumping around.
You put on some techno, he forgets his name,
DJ says "one more track" — Kchiaa's still the same!

And he loves hanging with the young crowd at the party,
Man refuses to accept that he's getting old, hardly.
Everybody's twenty-something, Kchiaa's like, "I'm young too!"
Bro, your knees just made a noise when you walked through. 😂

Chorus
Pipo and Kchiaa, what a dangerous pair,
One can't write a song, the other can't see the air.
You roast my music, you laugh at my flow,
But boys, after this track, you're gonna need a lawyer though!

Pipo on guitar, Kchiaa with the glasses,
Two best friends making absolutely no passes.
I love you both, yeah, that's still the truth,
But you started this war…

Now I'm coming for you!

Verse 3 — Double Attack
Pipo says, "Your lyrics need some work, my friend."
Kchiaa says, "Your beat should never start again."
I said, "Hold up, let me check something real quick…"
Pipo wrote that song?

Kchiaa built the beat with a hammer and a brick! 😂

One teaches music, one decorates the room,
Together they could probably decorate my tomb.
Pipo brings the guitar, Kchiaa brings the lights,
Then both of them disappear when it's time to pay the price.

Pipo's got the belly, Kchiaa's got the shades,
One writes lousy songs, the other throws raves.
You two wanna roast me? That's perfectly fine,
But don't forget who wrote the punchlines this time.

Bridge — Spoken
Pipo…
Put down the guitar.

Kchiaa…
Take off the glasses.

I need to talk to you boys seriously…

…

You both suck. 😂

But you're still my brothers.

Final Verse
Truth is, boys, I wouldn't trade you away,
Even though you make fun of every song that I play.
Pipo, you're a pain, Kchiaa, you're insane,
But life wouldn't be the same without you two in the frame.

So keep making jokes, keep giving me heat,
I'll keep making songs and putting you on the beat.
You wanted a diss? Well, now you got two,
And if you roast my next song…

I'll make Volume Two. 🔥😂

Outro
Pipo… tune that guitar.

Kchiaa… clean those glasses.

And both of you…

Shut up and listen to the song. 🎤😂