fuck you 😭

Lyrics

going to be honest I feel like a drunk cigarette can't do anything anymore I lay in my bed I wish we could have a love that ended now if only I were happy maybe we could stay together a little longer but I guess I just lay in my bed feeling like a drunk cigarette no I can't get up I got all this stuff in my head it's driving me crazy but honestly I guess that's who I really am now no one really cares to see who I am you said that you love me you said that you cared all of that was a lie going through my head maybe I should be f***** up like everything that made me that way I know that nothing ever good will happen to me so I let him in my bed I love getting high smoking weed doing whatever I got on me but then I feel like a drunk cigarette can't do anything in my bed anymore every single time I try and get my body hurts why do I keep on letting myself fall apart just because a few words you said maybe I should do something for real maybe I should get the hell out of this bed cuz it's not going to be my home forever though so I might as well get up I was yelled out pushed off and thrown off the edge until you pushed me so far to the point where I can't do anything anymore every single time I try and look at your face all I do is see her but I guess that's normal for me got to add it so much on my list damn it what the hell am I doing now I wish I was normal I just want to get out of this bed it's starting to feel like I live here I got food at the bed cuz all I really needed to live with is food water and a f****** bed so I might as well just living here like it belongs to me never want to go to school cuz all I do is sit in the back of the class talk about anywheres but here but I guess it's not going to get me anywhere because I end up in the principal's office almost 2.5 seconds in the day I know they stopped calling home now I'm too much of a problem but I never expected you to break up with me over something that you already knew when we started dating I guess it's just life I know that I'll never be okay because I never have been and I never will my crazy mind got me pushing me to the edge making me go cuckoo making me go crazy I can never think straight now all I ever do is talk about how to slowly kill someone it's kind of crazy I want to be surprised if I ended up in a mental hospital by tomorrow I don't see myself in a few years now when I'm talking like this cuz if I keep on feeling like a worn out broken cigarette what the hell am I going to do anyway it's not like talking about it's going to help anything and it's not like I can ever be fixed in the first place because when you look at me all I see myself it's a failure I can never look at the mirror anymore cuz whenever I do look in the mirror all I sees my father I don't want to be like him though and I don't want to stay forever like this though I know that it's not right you need to get my life right but it's not like it will happen anytime soon especially not if I'm looking at this and if I can look him in there I never do my makeup anymore cuz I know I'll just look like a father anyway it's like a stupid thing I can't go in my head keeps on repeating like a loop I cannot cut the wire it controls me